December 30, 2022
Who should you marry? How do you know that the person you’re seeing is the one? Those are important questions, but behind that question is a similar one. Will a relationship work only if we have shared interests?
A lot of people don’t think about this last question, but it is actually very important to know. Of course, you don’t want to marry someone who doesn’t share any of your same interests.
On the other hand, having some interests in common is important. Even though you may not like the exact same things if you are compatible you can make the relationship work for you. For example, you can both enjoy hobbies such as playing tennis or going on vacation together.
However, if you have some different interests and you still want to be with each other, you can find a way to compromise. Of course, you’ll have to try harder to make it work. The key to making your relationship work is to compromise. You need to show your partner that you care and that you love them. If you both can’t do this, you’ll have problems.
People usually think that couples with the same interests are more compatible. When two people share a love for a particular interest, it can help grease the wheels of the relationship.
Having a shared passion can bring you closer to the person that you’re seeing in a way that you may not have experienced in the past. It can help you solidify your feelings for someone or cross that barrier from friendship to a potential relationship. Thus, people can be more compatible by sharing common interests such as specific hobbies.
However, not everything is decided upon common interests. There are so many other factors that go into a relationship, including how each person views a plethora of different things like one’s future, personal goals, finances, children, and lifestyle, to name a few.
For example, it is important to talk about what each of you wants to do with your future with someone. You should talk about what your goals are. You should also ask your date any significant other questions and discuss them fully. Make sure you don’t judge him/her by their responses. That would be unfair.
A few people get married because they share a similar lifestyle. For example, if you like spending time with your partner and doing fun activities only with your partner, then you have a good chance of having a good marriage. Another example is that both of you like to spend time with family. Again, you are both on the path to a successful marriage.
The reason I used the two examples in the previous section is that the examples illustrate a much deeper connection that two individuals can have toward one another — satisfaction spending alone time with each other and placing family, the family they create together (their forthcoming children), as the centerpiece of their relationship. These are family values.
In the long run, family values are much more important than sharing a common interest in a particular hobby. Hobbies may come and go as we age, but family values are always a hardliner because commitment to our children is the cornerstone of a wonderous relationship.
Keep in mind the mandate that the first man and woman, Adam, and his wife, Eve, received from God. It was the blessing of the creation mandate. According to the book of Genesis, they were to fill the earth and they were to be stewards of creation.
(Genesis 1:28) “And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.”
Also, look at the words of the book of Psalm about how valuable children are to a relationship.
(Psalm 127: 3-5) “Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.”
Closing Comments
Sharing a common interest can certainly open the door to moving your relationship down the road sooner, but rushing into something just because of common interest isn’t advisable.
There are also people who don’t share many common interests that end up getting married. Is that advisable? While it can be difficult for a relationship to develop under these circumstances, it’s still doable.
The important thing is ensuring that each has respect toward what their partner is interested in. If two people care enough about each other to overcome any types of differences that may exist, and the two of you have had in-depth discussions about other important matters in which you find agreement, then you could be on your way to a great relationship.
But most important, coming to an agreement on the really important issues such as family values is the key to a successful long-term relationship. For keeping family values at the forefront demonstrates a life journey that you both are willing to travel, and endure, together.
And believe you me, raising children is not the easiest thing to endure in one’s life, but I wouldn’t have changed a moment of my life with my children. Even after leaving the nest, my two boys still make my heart throb when I look upon them. For they are MY Young Men. I have always been and will always be proud of the steps they take on this earth.
So, in the end, common interests do help build relationships, but alone, things like hobbies are not the glue that keeps couples together. Love for the other person, and how they treat and feel about each other is the secret recipe for success.
Add agreement on family values to the mix, plan on having a few kids, and I’d say the two of you have a winning team!
I’m Lori Stith, The Stoicess
Your Christian Life Coach
AND I believe in YOU!
If you like what you mentally, now see, join my website to learn and think like me at StoicMatchmaker.com.
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